So it’s been awhile since I have had butterflies so it’s definitely worth writing about. I have taken myself out of online dating and “chats” for a while now, only visiting these places for mainly 20 minutes at a time, getting frustrated and then leaving. But every now and then someone comes along that you just click with instantly. I will call him “Time and Space Guy” because I feel it was the universe that brought us together (and he loves the thought of alternate realities so it’s fitting).
I have often wondered where my lust has gone and where my ability to flirt has gone. With the beginning of the new year, the new writing gig, and all the good things that have happened the last few months I often wonder what has got me to this place. Can you forget how to flirt? Can you forget what it’s like to have your loins burn for someone you never met, or seen, but the way they express themselves just gets you going? I do like the mystery. It’s like the love letters of old. Where the Tom Hanks’ and the Meg Ryans are just writing to each other in emails with no idea of who is on the other end. People get too hung up on appearances. It’s all, “what do you look like” or my favorite “how big are your tits” (always classy by the way, so thanks porn and new generation of whores). I am so amped up right now at 2am it’s almost scary. Mind you, my sleeping pattern is still horrendous as I am killing my New Years resolution to get that in order, (also cheating with that Hennessy Colada earlier today, so freakin’ good by the way if you haven’t tried it).
So “Time and Space Guy” what will be our future? Of course he is half way round the world in Australia (what is it with me and these Aussies?), and the time difference is going to suck all the way around the same way he was imagining my mouth would be on his cock, oops! Yeah, the conversation went there. But you know, as much as I am all about intellectual conversation and having a man be interested in something other than what’s on my chest or between my legs, it was just fun being naughty and flirty, something I have deeply missed in my life. I wonder, have we become too desensitized by all this graphic pornography and sex sites that we have forgotten what it’s like to actually connect with another human being? Has it all come down to one-night stands and quick orgasms? What happened to courtship, or even foreplay?
In my own way, I am sorry for this generation. All the sexting and nude photos being passed, people are just “rubbing one out” and not taking the time to get to know someone anymore. I will admit something has sparked in me that has been long-lost. I do miss the connection, the butterflies, the overwhelming urge to reach over the ocean and take him in my arms (as unlikely as that is). I mean I can easily flash my boobs and have some guy masturbate to me, but even that gets tiring because what the heck do I get out of it, other than some exhibitionist “jollies” taken care of. But I will say this, nothing beats yearning for a man. Nothing beats wanting to see his text, or even hearing his voice, (I think if I heard his Aussie accent tonight I would have bust something to be honest). Through all of this we need to realize the fun and orgasmic poossibilites of the rush of the mystery. “Time and Space Guy” said something very important to me tonight, and he is living up to it as I type this. He said: “There is much more to getting a lady into bed, having her hunger for your next post, to have her think of you throughout the day and to know she is hooked on you is far more satisfying than a quick orgasm and never to be seen again.”
That sums it up. I will be thinking of you “Time and Space Guy” as I lay my head down tonight. And even though it is most likely that I won’t see you online again because of the time difference, know that you have rekindled my lust and desire, and you have brought back hope in the world of dating to me once more.
Peace and love, till next time.