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who are youWho are you?  Does your digital self reflect your real life self? I wondered about this as I was researching online dating over the past couple of days. I have found some wonderful entertaining blogs online. Here are some great picks as per this article 10 Best Funny Dating Blogs Thank you Google! But no entertainment is better than my own. I really didn’t want to be online dating, but I thought I would answer maybe some messages, you know, just to see what’s out there.  I came across a nice gentleman’s profile in which we “liked” each other, (thank you OKCupid for ripping that off Tinder as part of your “new features”).  Here are some details:

My self-summary
Hello nyc! I’ve been on here before deleted it and now back again. I’m a 35 year old Italian male who’s originally from buffalo, has a good job, sense of humor and loves hanging out. I love movies, long drives,hiking,going upstate, also the beaches in the hamptons. I just recently started working out…what a struggle lol
I love the fall and the winter season. Just something about changing leaves and the smell of the fireplace.
I’ve lived in queens prior, will not live in the boroughs after living in Li. More of a slower paced family life. I am looking for a long term relationship. Been on a roller coaster of one for over a year. Just want a normal relationship

What I’m doing with my life
Well I don’t work the usual 9-5 job with weekends off. My schedule and days off vary. I make time for people who are worth it. I hope you will do the same.

I’m really good at
I’m really good at telling stories, my job, and cooking. I’m Italian we know how to cook;)
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m very sarcastic, I talk with my hands, my features of Adam sandler…so I’m told. I have a tough exterior once you get to know me you’ll see that I’m a softy.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
The great Gatsby, the book and the Robert Redford version movie. To kill a mockingbird. For movies mystery men, anything batman,kickass,police academy,anchor man

I spend a lot of time thinking about
Why the hell is it so difficult to date...

You’re thinking: Cool guy right?! Not a bad profile, could be interesting so what do I get as a first message?

Him: hi
Me: Hi, how are you doing? I had a fabulous weekend going to the mall and the beach with my sister. How has your weekend been?
Him: it was ok urs?


Um, I am pretty sure this is the lamest person in the world.  He is looking for a normal relationship and this is how he messages? I mean, did I get it wrong? He finds it SO difficult to date…..why is that you think?  Now usually I don’t respond to “hi” but I read his profile and it was nice! Why are people like this? Have they become so jaded that they just half ass it? I mean if you are going to put ZERO effort into something, expect to get ZERO back.

I find this whole thing fascinating.  I know there are people out there online dating and it really is a hassle. I mean I got sucked in! Imagine? I thought I was done with dating but when we “liked” each other on OKCupid and we had an 86% compatibility I thought “hey maybe I will give this online dating a second chance” and……NOPE!  As excited as I got, I got just as deflated.  Then it made me wonder, do people actually put on a show with their online dating profile?   I mean I understand you are trying to sell yourself, and kudos for doing that and filling out a profile. I mean I got a “hi” message and I messaged back because the guy DID put effort into making a profile.  But then what’s up with the ambiguous “its ok urs” message? My weekend was great, (as I described), did he just choose to ignore what I said and just don’t give a shit no more?  I am thinking that’s what it is.  So guys, I know you’re out there trying to send girls messages and you hardly get responses, but PLEASE try not to be this guy.  I know you’re having a tough time out there, hey, I mean its tough for all of us.  I am pretty content being single, but I actually thought this guy would have been nice to know and perhaps even *gasp* have a relationship with.

But alas, que cera cera in the online dating world.  So remember WHO you are. If you’re fun and exciting in your profile, be fun and exciting in your messages. If you like the Great Gatsby and you love Batman, put on the bat signal and move forward! If you are good at telling stories, tell me one!

Lesson learned.

Stay tuned….