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love fadesWhat do you do when you’re the one left behind?  When no one told you, but you’re a distant memory?  You know I knew he was slipping, and that he wasn’t as interested as he once was, but the realization is heartbreaking. He said he was going to be busy though, and he said his teenage daughter is coming to live with him and he needs to prepare, all things my selfish mind don’t want to hear.  How am I going to start a relationship with this man?  This is way too complicated.  How will I be a stepmom?  I am so scared.

You know, life is a funny thing.  When “real life” hits and you have to step outside the fantasy world.  The guy from Virginia keeps calling.  Why do I keep him around?  I know I am not going to settle for him.  Sexually, he will NOT satisfy me.  I know this.  I will end up cheating or leaving him, like I already am.  The safe choice is not always the right choice.  Six months ago I was head over heels in love with the Virginia guy, but he just wasn’t putting in the effort and I just faded away.  Has that what happened in my current situation?  Did the Viking god forget about me?  Because I threw one away was I in turn thrown away?

Sigh, what goes around comes around.  You better be careful what you dish out.  I am feeling it.  Sitting here waiting for a man that I don’t really matter to.  Love fades, the fire dies, and you die inside along with it.